Are you in a Situationship? Or Relationship? Or just something.
My blog post this week is going to touch on “Situationships” or whatever we call them these days. This is kind of very random but I thought it would be nice to share with you guys who inspired this blog post.
So on Sunday, I went to the beach with a friend of mine, and while baking in the hot ass sun this elderly guy who owns a jet ski business (I’m assuming) came up to us and asked if we wanted to rent one of his jet skis for half an hour, we declined and said that we were good. Funny thing is, he stayed around and for whatever the reason after speaking to him for a while he started talking about relationships. So of course, as women, and single women at that, it peaked our interest;
I know I wanted to know what oldie had to say….
*you guys know singles speak more about relationships than people that are actually in a relationship.* lol as I’m writing this I am legit smh because it’s so sad lol.
Anyways lemme move on…..
The highlight of the conversation for me was when he expressed that sometimes we expect the same treatment from people that we have given to them, especially the person we may be sleeping with, dating or hanging out with; the (situational partner) lol. But overall…..why do we have these high expectations?
And of course, it is because we are doing the most and a bit too much when we already know that the other person isn’t on the same wave length, or even want the same things that we do. Most times we get ourselves into “situationships” knowing exactly what it is. Or what it is NOT!
I kinda found him so open and honest for an older man, and I must say everything he was saying was pretty pretty accurate when I thought deeper about it.
As women and even sometimes men, we get ourselves in “situationships”, but being a part of these types of relationships half the time, always end up bad. Either the guy may have hurt the girl or vice versa. * I can only really speak from a woman’s perspective but I am quite sure that men go through the same shit as us. *
Buttt as women, why do we always put ourselves in that position, where we expect the most out of a man who is not committed to us, knowing damn well he does not want commitment. When you speak to most women, they always put so much energy into one person thinking that he is “the one”, knowing they are in a situationship. The funny thing is that most times, man would have expressed exactly what he wants which is NOT a relationship.
So why does the situationship ends up going down a toxic path where the person (woman) feels entitled to be in an actual relationship with their situational partner?
I had so many questions like: is it wrong for him/her to feel entitled or deserving? Who is wrong? Is someone even wrong? What should you do? Should you leave or stay? Why wasn’t he/she honest? Is it that serious?
Shoot!!!!! I think my questions could go on and on.
I don’t even think that there is a right answer for these types of questions, because all situations are different. Plus maybe the guy/woman would have expressed that they would want a relationship soon, IDK.
Who really knows what goes on in someone’s situationship anyways?
Btw, every time I type that “situationship” word I laugh.
This is where I give my opinion on the whole situationships thing.
- If you meet someone and they don’t want a relationship and you know you’re NOT on that same wave length….move on to the next if there is a next, shoot!!! just keep it moving.
- You should not even bother, just friendzone that person if you like being around them.
- If you know you don’t mind being in a situationship, don’t complain or EXPECT ANYTHING from your situational partner.
- Don’t try to be the girlfriend/boyfriend while in your situationship.
- For the women out there, stop or don’t do girlfriend type shit like cooking, cleaning or even sleeping over. Keep it strictly platonic, don’t get your strings tied up. andddd
- If you feel like you’re in more of a relationship rather than a situationship….it is time for you and your situational partner to have a talk.
These are just my opinions on the matter, it’s not the bible lol.
In relationships….oooppps situationships, whatever you want to call it or label it, both male and female involved have no right to be jealous or be in your feelings even though it’s hard AF. If it’s hard for you to not get jealous, you should probably leave that situation. Sometimes it’s better to be by yourself rather than get into something knowing there is no good outcome from it. Listen to what the man or even woman tells you, you can’t force them to be in a relationship. If he says he doesn’t want one, trust me that’s exactly what he means, even if he supposedly shows and acts differently.
This is a debatable topic and at the same time it’s really not *shrugs*.
I guess do whatever you think makes you happy and in the process try not to get used, abused or taken advantage of.
Until next week!